09.04.01 - 5:31 p.m.

about Kerry and Justine's apartment:

good things living with friends who are clean, artistic and confirmed not to be crack whores close to Dan my own room on its own floor my own bathroom to go along with it (woo, showers and baths!) parking space for Le Car

bad things living with friends can make them not be my friends anymore possibly too expensive, as I have no job yet not in the city, but in Jersey not even sure apartment is really up for grabs, so why am I writing this list?

But I do have the new Douglas Coupland book in my hot little hands, and my sister is a bona fide Bobbins rock star, and I'm going to see my man for a whole big week and a half starting tomorrow. So life can't be all bad. Even though sometimes it makes me walk around the Art Institute in a daze and not pay attention to Miss Expanding Universe when really who knows when I'll see it again?

I am vacillating between extreme sadness at leaving and extreme excitement for what comes next. I drove by the Tiny Lounge yesterday and burst into tears, but then come home to three emails from friends on the east coast that I'll be able to see without major transportation obstacles soon. So what to do?

The job will come. The apartment will come. I need to be Zen about this and believe that everything that happens is meant to be. Too much time wasted thinking about what should be and what could have been when I just need to concentrate on being the most kickass potential Rolling Stone employee there is and not let anything fucking get in my way. Ahhh.