08.05.01 - 11:06 a.m.

And love is not the easy thing
The only baggage that you can bring
Not the easy thing
The only baggage you can bring
Is all that you can't leave behind

No, Dad, you don't know what it is, because you've never taken one healthy risk in your life. You married your long-suffering high school girlfriend, never finished grad school, took one stupid insurance job and then when that was too hard, went back to the family business where you could stay under Grandpa's money shelter for the rest of your life. Then when that didn't pan out, your risks were undercut by all your connections, and even then when you possibly could have left Johnstown, you didn't. All your risks involved bad choices with women, and you're lucky to keep finding those who will give you a second chance. I certainly wouldn't trust you further than I can spit.

So don't tell me what it is to be an adult, I don't need your sermonizing and "I know it's hard, Case," because I don't want your version of what it is to be one. I don't want to be dependent on you any more, but do you know how hard you've made it? I went to a good school, a great school, because you told me not to worry about it, and when I didn't know what to do after graduation, you told me to go to another expensive grad school. And even when I questioned the financial reality, you said "Go." And now I have loans, and no savings, and I still don't know what I'm doing, and when I see myself acting like you, it makes me physically sick.

You've given me all this financial support, but I don't feel like you understand me mentally or emotionally at all.