02.14.02 - 4:14 p.m.

I don't know how it got to be Thursday already. I don't know how I suddenly got so sleepy - that shouldn't be happening for another hour and a half. Must be the beans and rice?

I felt so young today at the doctor's, surrounded by all the women with their big round bellies and the doting men beside them. First time I'd ever been in a real ob/gyn for an appointment - everything else was free through whatever school I was attending. I went into the office where there were TWO big leather chairs and I put my lone self in one of them, feeling like Lily Tomlin's Edith Ann, while the doctor acted all parental and kind after he asked my age and I squeaked out, "23." He seemed visibly relieved when I told him I had a long-term boyfriend.

Then in the exam room was something I'd never seen before, something that struck fear into my heart: a sonogram monitor. I'd never been up close and personal with one since they aren't exactly common in college infirmaries (as my parents refer to student health services), but they've been given a lot of TV airtime lately. I stared at it with suspicion as I undressed, afraid that it might have the power to impregnate me if I didn't keep at a safe distance. It stared back, blank and baleful, until I was safely clothed and on my way.

Then at work I got a stupid email forward that made me feel so old. This is an excerpt:

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1983.

� They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
� Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
� Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
� The CD was introduced the year they were born.
� They have always had an answering machine.
� They have always had cable.
� They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
� Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
� Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
� They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
� They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
� They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
� They never heard "Where's the beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel," or "De plane, Boss, de plane."
� They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.
� Michael Jackson has always been white.
� McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
� They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

At least I am old enough to remember 90% of these things.