08.11.03 - 8:40 p.m.

Time to get drunk. Time to not finish the work I brought home, or update my resume, or even look for other jobs. This is why I don't HAVE a new job. This is why I am miserable.

Also, Dan is still in Maine and I am lonely. The cat, though adorable, is no substitute. He is also in an apartment in Hoboken, where there is no parking. He and I had a teen movie-fest yesterday afternoon, watching 10 Things I Hate About You and half of Never Been Kissed, so I don't feel too guilty about only spending a half hour with him tonight. There was no parking! I had to double-park with my flashers! I don't know for how long it's kosher to do that in Hoboken! (For the record: at Bucknell, probably kosher to do that for two hours. Well, probably not anymore. But in my day....)

Why am I always so mean to Moom when she is here, then miss her so much when she's gone? I am like the asshole boyfriend who cheats and lies and then begs my codependent girlfriend to take me back, sobbing that I'd be nothing without her.

Although I DID turn her on to the Marc Jacobs perfume and let her eat mussels, so I guess I'm not a complete failure as a daughter.