08.22.03 - 4:57 p.m.

It's going to hurt me to recap what happened last night, but it's my duty. And yes, I was very drunky. And funky.

Met Kerry at the 23rd st. E stop and walked over to Lot 61. Downing three Absolut Mandrin and tonics in quick succession, I followed them with half an Absolut Vanilia cosmo that I kind of stole from this woman at our table whom Kerry and I agreed looked like a psycho version of Mary Lynn Rajskub. There were no hors d'oeuvres at the press event, which was a little disconcerting given that we were drinking vodka like water.

We were already inebriated and Kerry needed a slice of pizza. It would have been intelligent for me to have one too, but I am no brainiac. I can't even remember where we got the pizza. At Bleecker Bar, I dumped half my free Amstel, shoved into my hand by well-meaning Peggy, into the sink. Decided now was a good time to begin purging myself of the vanilla cosmo. Apparently I was a little wobbly. Carey's day-after email reported, "Oh man, you were in FINE form last night." Bassett wrote that "you called me last night, accidentally, drunk, and i couldn't understand anything that you said, but it was very cute." This I do not recall, but I was cute. So yay.

I think Dan made us leave. Saying good-bye to Carey, I started to cry. We got on the bus. It was smelly. I got off at the first stop after the Lincoln Tunnel, across from Houlihan's and left Dan on the bus. Sitting on a bench, dry heaving over the side, I accumulated a nice puddle of spit. It was foamy. I really thought I was going to fall asleep on a metal bench in Lincoln Harbor. This may have been when I called Bassett, but I'm not sure. I changed my welcome note on my phone to "quarterlife crisis." I dialed 911 on my phone and held it in my hand, ready to hit 'send' if anything shady occurred. I found it, still ready to dial, when I emptied my purse this morning. Thankfully, I don't think the phone made any unauthorized calls while I passed out. Mars watched over me from the southeastern quadrant of the sky until Dan picked me up.

I think I apologized profusely. I certainly hope that was the case.

And today I was rewarded for my drunken idiocy by finally getting my $28 Marc Jacobs leather cuff in the mail. Ahhhhhh.