01.23.04 - 11:32 p.m.

OK, people. I ATE A BLT! With real Applewood smoked bacon on it! And it was awesome! I thought my sister had the bacon-loving gene, but apparently it was passed to me, somewhere around the Great Turkey Bacon Snarf-Down of 1995. This is the first non-poultry, non-piscine product I've had since the accidental bite of hot dog in college, and since the wee prosciutto I had in Seattle. It's been 12 years since I made the solemn vow to stop eating red meat altogether. Oh, Seattle. That is where the downfall began, I just know it. But it was so salty! And I don't even feel ill at all!

I am not going to make this a habit. I just really wanted a BLT. On sourdough bread with watercress, avocado and a spicy pepper aioli with vinegary pommes frites. Come on, with a menu description like that, how could anyone resist?

Oh, and I was told something interesting tonight about my boss and a powerful mind-altering drug. Explains a lot! I'm not supposed to tell anyone, so that's as detailed as it gets, I suppose. Everyone is miserable in our office. Everyone. Not that this makes the workday any more bearable, but it's just a small comfort to have in the back of my head.

I am still unhireable, however. And Louis the stomach is just now starting to make funny noises. No, Louis! Keep it down! It will be all right, I swear!