12.13.04 - 10:05 p.m.

Sigh. I've been having these mini-breakdowns of crying jags, mostly precipitated by notes from my grandmother or sad parts of shows where I think about being left alone. How my grandma is now alone and how she's getting along with things, and how someday Dan will leave and I'll be all alone again. It doesn't make me stop wanting to marry him, it just makes me sad for the inevitable future, for the someday when I won't have him around anymore.